Graduated

Well, so that's it. On Sunday, I graduated from Carnegie Mellon University with as a Master of Science in Electrical and Computer Engineering, and in about a month and a half, I go on to begin the next phase of my life life, doing chip design for NVIDIA in Santa Clara, CA.

About four years ago, I wrote a similar post to how I feel now, and in taking the time to reflect on that, I can't help but remain in awe of how much I've changed... and how much I'm the same. At the end of high school, I had just finished a time of transition; in my senior year, I had suddenly learned how to act as a social being, and what it meant to really build a circle of friends around me. In an instant, at the end, it had all disappeared; the moment that I had to write to write the post I linked before is all I had to gain closure. A few hours later, I got on a plane and went off to work in California, 4,000 miles away from everything I had ever known.

This time, it's a little different. Instead of a moment of sudden growth, followed by a sharp ending, everything has been more gradual. Over my four years at Carnegie Mellon, I slowly built on what I already had, learned as I could. For my first year at school, I was emotionally very sick, and that nearly incapacitated me for a long time. I regressed, and for much of that time, I essentially shut down as a person -- indeed, my freshman year, I very nearly dropped out of school. But upon that, my recovery rebuilt and shaped me in ways that I could only dream of four years ago; I feel as though I am more stable, more open, and more capable than I could ever conceive of being before. I have surely grown academically in the past four years too, but as far as I can tell, the things that Carnegie Mellon has taught me in the classroom pale in comparison to the other 114 (at least, if we go by unit count) hours each week.

I feel like I have more closure now, as I mentioned in a previous post. There are still people I didn't quite say goodbye to -- but that's OK; I'll be back for Carnival. I'm sure I'll think of things I should have done while I was there. That's OK too. I'll miss a lot of aspects of CMU, to be sure; if I didn't, something would be very wrong! But in the end, here's where I am; undergraduate is behind me now.

I would be remiss when closing this chapter of my life not to take the time to thank some important people. As soon as I click "Post to joshua_", of course, I will realize that I forgot to mention someone in specific, but I won't be able to put my finger on who; so to whoever that is, please accept my apologies in advance!

Probably vastly most influential in me having some degree of success in my time at Carnegie Mellon, and most deserving of my thanks, are Dave Eckhardt and Mark Stehlik. These two incredible individuals impacted my life almost from my first day at Carnegie Mellon, when they gave me the benefit of the doubt, and allowed me to take our undergraduate Operating Systems course, 15-410. Mark continued to act as a not-quite-advisor for me for the rest of my time at Carnegie Mellon, when I continued to take classes from the Computer Science department. I mentioned earlier that I was very close to dropping out in my freshman year; without these two remarkable people, I probably would have. For that, then, I owe my deepest gratitude to both Mark and Dave.

I proceeded to work with Dave for the remainder of my time at CMU, serving as a Teaching Assistant for 410 for my sophomore, junior, and senior years. I took 15-412 -- our Operating Systems practicum course -- from him in the Fall of my sophomore year, and over time, Dave entrusted me with more of the functioning of '410, letting me give a few lectures here and there and design some projects on occasion. Dave served as an incredible mentor for and friend to me, giving me enough room to express my creativity, but also nudging me in the right direction when I went astray. I don't think I can find words for how thankful I am to have had him around.

Deserving of thanks too is twinofmunin, who behaved as a wonderful friend and companion when times were at their darkest, but when happiness came too. There were many things about our relationship that I wish had been different, or that I'd change; ultimately, though, our time together summed to a wonderful experience for me, and importantly, a catalyst for growth. Car, thank you.

Also important in the last handful of years -- even before college -- was zagarus. Chris, for better or worse, also acted as a mentor for me; we learned, discovered, and played together, building, thinking, making, and doing. Often enough we'd get in trouble together, too... but isn't that what friends are for? I learned so much from Chris. He may never understand why I'm thanking him, but that's OK. Chris, my gratitude; and here's to more years to come together.

One last person that I should mention is j4cbo. Jacob and I were locked in what seemed like an ego battle to the death during our time as freshmen... and now here we are, and in just under two months, we'll be housemates somewhere in the South Bay. No matter how much animosity we had for each other at times, we came together to work on a series of exciting projects; I'm glad we did. So, I'm happy to take the opportunity to recognize him here. Jacob, thanks.

And to whoever I missed -- I apologize. There were a lot of people that shaped me into who I am, and I feel honored to have been in the presence of so many wonderful people in the past four years.

Now is a time of tentative optimism for me. I am excited by what the future holds. In the words of Bill Watterson, through his character Calvin:

"It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy... let's go exploring!"

See you all around.